Stray
by FeistyDreams
Summary: Songfic to Stray. Follows Sousuke through the years, from a young Kashim to a man with a young son of his own. T for some mild swearing.


**AN: I've always loved the Wolf's Rain soundtrack, and when I pulled it out of storage and started listening to it, I felt as though the lyrics and even the sound of the some of the songs fit Sousuke pretty well. And this is what happened.**

**(Same note as on Run, Wolf Warrior, Run)**

**Brief edit: Aivalf, you are absolutely correct. XD I worded it wrong, which is what I get for not proof-reading better. Gauron is Japanese, what I meant by referring to him as Cambodian is that he was raised by the Cambodian Pol Pot much the same way Sousuke was raised by the Afghanis. I'm not going to change it, not yet at least, because I believe was still working as a Cambodian and was being hired out by them. But let it be known it is not his nationality.**

**My bad, and thanks for pointing it out!  
**

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* * *

**_//Stray! Stray!_

_In the cold breeze that I walk along_

_The memories of generations burn within me_

_Been forever since I cried the pain and sorrow_

_I live and die, proud of my people gaining//_

Kashim stood watch that night. It was the first time they trusted the task to him. He felt proud. He had somehow gotten these men to trust him. For nearly a year now, he had been fighting side by side with the gruff guerrilla warriors.

Of course it took time for them to trust him. He only came to be there because he had been sent by the Russians to kill their general, Majhid. It had taken a year, and a lot of dead Russians, but he had finally proved he had no love for the country that sent him.

Back there, life was rough for no good seeming reason. They said it was to make them tougher, but the atrocities he witnessed could not possibly have been for their benefit. Especially not when he saw the sick, sadistic pleasure the soldiers took from them. Here, at least, life was rough because it had to be.

They lived off the land. They paid for their food in whatever way they could. They were trying to make life better here. There was a purpose, there was a goal, something truly worth fighting for. He had finally found what he hesitantly called a family. At the very least, it was a place he belonged.

He stood up with his AK-47 and walked his area. The cold wind blew through his long hair. He was intent. He had heard a sound. It could have been an animal, but it sounded too heavy. He pretended to just be stretching his legs. He even feigned a yawn, and that's when the hair on the back of his neck stood up.

Kashim grinned. Tonight, he really would prove himself. The Russians thought they had won the night, since a kid was on control. They would not live to learn from their mistake. He fired his gun into the night.

_//I'm here standing at the edge_

_Starin up at where the moon should be//_

He felt nothing. Not at first, anyways. No anger. No sadness. No regret.

Then, it all began to mount. His entire body shook, and he hardly registered the hand on his shoulder.

Why? If they had just been killed, just been defeated, he could accept that. But why did the bastard have to rip their bodies apart? It was obvious they had won by bringing Arm Slaves where there were none. But to do what had been done, they would have had to leave their machines after killing everyone. They had won and then taken the time to desecrate the bodies.

Kashim did not cry. He did feel their loss though. He may not have shared their religion, but he knew it, and he could not give them a proper burial with their bodies as they were. He would do what he could, though.

He turned away from the Russian ex-soldier that he had befriended and walked to his RK-91. He climbed in and used the machine to dig a grave. He hated that he had to give them a mass grave, but it was the best he could manage.

He wanted to be able to find their killer before the trail got cold. It was a long day and he was finally done. After some deliberation, he had decided to leave the Savage as a grave marker. He did not think it too lavish. To him, it was a simple testimony to who the men were, and how they lived and died.

Finally, they had found him. Kashim stood beside Kalinin on a cliff in the Panjshir Valley. Instead of looking down, to where their killer was, that Cambodian assassin Gauron, he looked up.

It was a cloudy night and he could not see the moon. That was all right though, it gave him a strategic advantage. He thought, perhaps, they were proud of him, and were helping him in whatever way they now could. It was foolish and unrealistic, but he thought it all the same.

Soon, Gauron would die. He fixed his sniper rifle on his shoulder and began the descent, not caring for Kalinin's warnings.

_//Stray!_

_No regrets 'cause I got nothin to lose_

_Ever stray!_

_So I'm gonna live my life as I choose_

_Until I fall.._

_Stray! Stray!_

_Stray! Stray!//_

He hated to admit it, but he had found a Russian he liked. Perhaps it was because they met the same way he had met Majhid. Kashim trying to kill him and getting caught. It was lucky for him that the man was abandoning his army, otherwise he would have been killed.

Perhaps not, though. There had been an odd spark of recognition in the man's eye when he saw who he had captured. He did not speak of it though, and Kashim did not ask.

In any event, the man had his usefulness. He was even a little grateful that Kalinin had offered to help track down Gauron. Not that he would admit it.

Finally, the bastard was in his sights. He stayed as he was, unmoving, waiting for the right moment. He might be young, but he understood the value of patience better than most adults. Understanding the value did not mean he liked to exercise it, though, and he knew he would be no master sniper. He did not want to be.

But as long as he killed Gauron, he was good enough for his own liking.

Here it was, the moment he had been waiting for these past few months. He squeezed the trigger and resisted the urge to shout in triumph when he saw the bullet hit its mark, just high of being between the eyes.

It had come time for them to say good-bye. Kalinin grabbed his shoulder and gave him a stern nod, then turned to leave. As for Kashim, he would head out for the next war. He could find some mercenary work in Cambodia. He might only be around twelve years old, but he would prove his worth and make his money.

That was his life as he knew it.

_//In the white freeze, I never spoke of tears_

_Or opened up to anyone including myself_

_I would like to find a way to open to you_

_Been awhile, don't know if I remember how to//_

The snow fell around them, creating a beauty that almost seemed mocking. He looked down at Kaname, who had her arms wrapped around herself as she tried to hold back tears.

He wanted to reach out to her. But how? He barely knew his own feelings, so what could he possibly tell her that she would want to hear?

His hands clenched at his sides and he looked away, unable to bear the sight of this strong girl breaking down in front of him.

Because of him.

Nothing in his life had ever prepared him for this moment.

In fact, it was his life that had caused this moment. If only he had lived a normal life, he would know what to do.

How could he tell her that?

_//I'm here waiting on the edge_

_Would I be alright showing myself to you?_

_It's always been so hard to do..//_

It was maddening. He had to do something, but he did not know if he could jump off the cliff in his mind's eye. It would all depend on how much trust he could put in this girl.

Sousuke reached out to grab her hand and yanked her forward, looking down at her intently, eyes filled with pain. She was still fighting those tears, and she almost lost her own battle when she saw his pain.

She glanced away and took a few steadying breaths, calming herself. Finally, she reached up and placed a gentle hand on his cheek. She raised her head and gave him the strongest smile she could muster. For the first time he could ever recall, his knees felt weak.

That smile pushed him over the edge.

_//Stray!_

_No regrets 'cause I got nothin to lose_

_Ever stray!_

_So I'm gonna live my life as I choose_

_Until I fall..._

_Stray! Stray!_

_Stray! Stray!_

_Stray! Stray!//_

He remembered when he had stood in front of the officers and demanded changes be made to his contract. They could not take away anything they had not already tried to. All they could do was give it back. And he had made sure he took it.

It had felt good, and now, he was happier than ever with his decision.

He lay awake in the dark with Kaname pressed against him. They had finally consummated their relationship that night, and he felt very satisfied with his life for once.

Every bit of it had led to this moment. Every bit of it had led him finding her, fighting for her, and finally, loving her.

All in all, a good life, he felt.

_//Is there a place left there for me_

_Somewhere that I belong_

_Or will I always live this way... ?_

_Always stray//_

They weren't stupid. Of course they weren't. His classmates had finally realized that Sousuke was more than just a military otaku with a history of living in countries that saw their fair share of action.

Of course, they would not have realized it so soon if he had not actually killed someone in front of them. At least the person was not innocent. He truly had been after Kaname. Thankfully, he had managed to keep that bit secret, so she would not take the fall with him.

Now, though, he could not go to school. For some reason, that saddened him. He had not realized that he had become attached to the place.

He shook his head. That was not what saddened him.

He had liked the school because everyone was innocent. He had taken that innocence by making them witness death.

It was not just him that could not return to that school. It was everyone. Because _that school_, the way he thought of it, no longer existed.

_//No regrets 'cause I got nothin to lose_

_Ever stray!_

_So I'm gonna live my life as I choose_

_Cause all things fall_

_Stray! Stray!_

_Stray! Stray!_

_Stray! Stray!_

_Stray...//_

It was several years later. They had covered up his killing at school, but not enough that he could attend a Japanese college. Not when there was a chance of running into someone from Jindai. That was all right, though.

He had found other ways to keep an eye on Kaname while she attended college, and she obliged him with only some minor admonishing. And now, they had respectable jobs. Mithril had let him go, and let him keep his fake records so he could keep his current life.

Now, he was a father, killing was no longer his job, he had a beautiful wife, a nice home, a decent income. He had everything he had never thought he could.

He smiled as he looked out on the ocean, fishing with his young son.

All his years of wandering had brought him to this place, this time.

It was a good life.

* * *

**Stray**

**Vocals: Steve Conte**

**Music: Yoko Kanno  
**

**Lyrics: Tim Jenson**


End file.
